The Economy is So Bad That… | Confabulicious

The Economy is So Bad That… | Confabulicious: “- Sent using Google Toolbar”

These are hysterical:

I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

African television stations are now showing ‘Sponsor an American Child’ commercials.

Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can’t afford batteries.

I ordered a burger at McDonald’s and the kid behind the counter asked, “Can you afford fries with that?”

CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.

Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

My ATM gave me an IOU!

A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of pennies while she danced.

I saw a Mormon polygamist with only one wife.

I bought a toaster oven and my free gift with the purchase was a bank.

If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.

Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.

My cousin had an exorcism but couldn’t afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!

A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.

Motel Six won’t leave the light on anymore.

A picture is now only worth 200 words.

They renamed Wall Street “Wal-Mart Street”.

When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.

The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.

Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!

And, finally…

I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.

Thanks, Confabulicious!

Advertisements

About boomergrl49

Mom, Grandma, social worker, blogger. I love reading fiction of all kinds, and I'm also addicted to television, especially Fringe!

Posted on August 14, 2010, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. LOL…

    cry!

    Warm Aloha from Waikiki 🙂

    Comfort Spiral

  2. Haha, let's hope it's not really that bad! lol

  3. Hopefully it's getting better, Lady B 🙂

%d bloggers like this: